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“Finding a Counselor is like Finding the Right Pair of Shoes…”

Updated: Jun 6, 2020

...is a sentence I start with during every intake session with a client. We all have preferences for the types of shoes we enjoy wearing. Why would having a preference for the type of counselor you work with be any different?

I explain to clients that some “shoes fit but aren’t always comfortable.” It is my job to make sure you find a shoe that fits and works for you...and sometimes that isn’t always me. Counseling is a journey, at times a rocky and steep journey, and having the right pair of shoes is a step towards success. Not all shoes are serve the same purpose, just like not all clients have the same path towards their goals, so honest and upfront planning is critical in any hike.


A quality counselor acknowledges this to be true and helps client's find the best shoes for them. It is important to place the client's goals above pride, business, etc. Studies consistently find that the one of the strongest predictors of client outcome success is the counseling relationship, often accounting for more of the outcome than the skills utilized (Stargell, 2017). A shoe that fits will also have a strong understanding that counseling is a mutual collaboration between the counselor and client. In doing so, clients and counselors are able to create, connect, and direct therapy towards meaningful goals with lasting outcomes (Tishby & Wiseman, 2018).


Helpful tips for counselors and clients when trying on a new pair of shoes...


Counselors:

  • Be transparent with clients about the relationship process.

  • Explain how you approach counseling and your style at the beginning of your journey.

  • Keep a directory of counselors that may work differently than you for client referrals.

  • Evaluate the relationship throughout the therapeutic journey and seek to adjust to meet the client's needs.

  • Be open, and willing to accept feedback from your client.

Clients:

  • Be willing to test the “shoe” before returning it to the rack.

  • Share what is helpful, and not helpful, throughout the process so your counselor knows how to adjust to meet your needs.

  • Don’t give up on your mental health needs after trying on one pair of shoes.

  • Trust that your counselor is willing to listen to your needs.

  • Be open, and willing to accept feedback from your counselor.



References:


Tishby, O., & Wiseman, H. (2018). Developing the Therapeutic Relationship: Integrating Case Studies, Research, and Practice

Stargell, N. A. (2017). Therapeutic Relationship and Outcome Effectiveness: Implications for Counselor Educators. The Journal of Counselor Preparation and Supervision, 9(2).


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